Cancer Journey: A Young Life’s Awesome Farewell

A Young Life Cut Short: Tanner Martin’s Battle with Colon Cancer

In American Fork, Utah, amidst the picturesque mountains, a young widow, Shay Martin, cradled her two-month-old daughter, AmyLou, at the funeral of her husband, Tanner. Tanner Benjamin Martin, only 30 years old, lost his battle with colon cancer, a disease that is increasingly affecting young adults across the nation.

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The surface of Tanner’s casket was adorned with Star Wars stickers, placed by loved ones as a tribute to his passions. As hymns intertwined with the iconic Star Wars score filled the air, over 660 people gathered to mourn the loss of a beloved husband, father, son, and friend. Another 31,000 individuals, many of whom were strangers touched by Tanner’s story, watched the service via YouTube Live. A TikTok video, where Tanner announced his own impending death, garnered nearly 15 million views.

In the video, Tanner shared, “Life was awesome. I really enjoyed it while I was here. Hopefully, I believe there’s something after this, and hopefully, we’re hanging out now. There’s just a lot of people in the afterlife that I’m excited to see them not in pain and just happy.”

A Diagnosis and a Life Lived to the Fullest

Five years prior to his death, Tanner received the devastating diagnosis of colon cancer. He and Shay navigated the complexities of his illness by sharing their journey online, providing raw and honest updates. Their videos documented the progression of the disease, their dreams for their child, and the difficult reality of facing mortality.

Tanner’s family rallied around him, ensuring that he experienced a lifetime of joy in his final years. However, with his passing, they had to learn to navigate a world without his presence.

Tanner had always been active and health-conscious. He and Shay prioritized a healthy lifestyle, cooking at home and exercising regularly. Therefore, when Tanner began experiencing stomach pain and bowel issues, doctors initially dismissed it as something minor. Sadly, six months later, the diagnosis came: Stage 4 colon cancer, already spread to his liver, and deemed terminal.

The Growing Crisis of Early-Onset Colorectal Cancer

Delayed diagnoses are unfortunately common among young adults with colorectal cancer. Individuals under 50 are more likely to be diagnosed at later stages compared to their older counterparts. For men under 50, only 32% of colon cancer cases are detected early, compared to 37% in men over 50. In cases like Tanner’s, young men are more likely to learn they have the disease only after it has metastasized.

A study published in JAMA revealed that gastrointestinal cancers, including colon, stomach, throat, and pancreatic cancers, are among the largest subset of early-onset cancers globally. The prognosis for young people is often similar to or worse than that of older individuals with the same cancers.

Embracing Parenthood Amidst Illness

Despite the grim prognosis, Tanner and Shay were determined to live their lives and start a family. Their daughter, AmyLou, was born on May 15th. By that time, Tanner was on a last-resort treatment, with the cancer affecting his lungs, lymph nodes, liver, and colon.

AmyLou’s arrival gave Tanner renewed hope. He cherished every moment with her, reading her stories and holding her close. Even confined to his bed or couches, Tanner found joy in simple outings, riding his mobility scooter and visiting his cemetery plot, which he and Shay had purchased in advance.

The Final Days

In June, Tanner’s health deteriorated rapidly. After months of resistance, he finally agreed to hospice care. However, his final days were far from peaceful. Doctors administered powerful medications to alleviate his pain and distress, but nothing seemed to provide relief.

Despite his suffering, Tanner found moments of connection with loved ones. He communicated in fragments, offering glimpses of his thoughts and feelings.

On June 24th, Tanner’s parents, Tom and Kim, were so distressed that they requested prayers for his peaceful passing. The next day, Tanner insisted on watching the entire original Indiana Jones trilogy. That night, Shay whispered “I love you,” to which he responded with a soft but steady, “I love you too.”

Early the following morning, Tanner woke up, reacting to a fight scene in “The Last Crusade.” As his breathing changed, his family gathered around him. Shay placed AmyLou next to him on the bed, and the baby instinctively reached out, her tiny hand resting on her father’s.

Tanner passed away on June 25th at 5:07 a.m. He had 41 days with his daughter.

A Legacy of Love and Remembrance

In the wake of Tanner’s passing, his family grappled with grief and the daunting task of rebuilding their lives. Tom found solace in the clear sky on the day of his son’s death, while Kim struggled with the emptiness and loss. Spencer, Tanner’s brother, questioned the injustice of a life cut short.

As time passed, they began to consider the future. Spencer considered a career in nursing, inspired by his experience caring for Tanner. Tom and Kim planned to reconnect and rediscover their passions.

Shay, now a young widow, faced the daunting task of raising AmyLou without Tanner. She found solace in the rhythms of motherhood and the support of her family.

Tanner’s funeral was a celebration of his life. His father shared stories from his childhood, and friends spoke of his unwavering support and kindness. Tanner was dressed in traditional temple clothing, Navajo moccasins, and a Darth Vader necklace. Shay wore matching jewelry, and AmyLou wore a onesie made from one of Tanner’s old “Rebels Against Cancer” T-shirts.

Moving Forward, Honoring Tanner’s Memory

In the months leading up to his death, Tanner and Shay had meticulously planned for his passing. They held a living funeral, chose his headstone, and created a documentary about his life.

In the days following Tanner’s funeral, Shay began to create a list of goals to honor his memory:

• Keep the Rebels Against Cancer foundation going to support young cancer patients.
• Visit the Mesa temple in Arizona, where Tanner had wanted to take AmyLou.
• Hold Christmas in July.
• Create a social media series called “Letters to Heaven,” echoing Tanner’s signature greeting: “Hey, it’s me, Tanner.”

Shay’s letters would begin, “Hey Tanner. It’s me, Shay.”

These letters would become both a signature and, eventually, a goodbye, ensuring that Tanner’s legacy of love, resilience, and hope would live on.